The intense scrutiny and heavy criticism that has come with his time at Manchester United has taken its toll on Louis van Gaal and reduced him to calling all of his players “Michael.” First there was “Michael” Smalling (a mistake he first made last July with Smalling right next to him, then again in November), now there’s “Michael” Keane.

Van Gaal went on to admit that Michael is somehow an “easy name” for him. And that he has also now given Chris Smalling the nickname “Pele.”

At this point, it seems cruel to make fun of him. Clearly the man needs help. Michael “Maradona” Woodward needs to put him out of his misery and sack him before this goes any further.