Louis van Gaal instills a hint of menace to David De Gea contract announcement


David De Gea signed a new four-year contract with Manchester United that he almost certainly will not come close to seeing out with them. To mark the occasion, he posed for a few photos with Louis van Gaal. Who, as per usual, made it weird.

In the picture above, note how De Gea laughs uncomfortably as Van Gaal stares him down while appearing to say “If you try to leave again, I will hunt you and then I will wear your intestines as a pretty necklace.”

Then they shook hands. Van Gaal pulled De Gea’s hand close to him and almost certainly held it there for an awkwardly long amount of time while squeezing too hard and making odd grunting sounds through his forced, all too intense smile.


Once Van Gaal left the room, De Gea probably started shaking uncontrollably and panic eating donuts two at a time. This is only the beginning of an intimidation filled season.