Not your day, Dani.

The week’s most absurd soccer moments

By Sam Patterson

James Rodriguez had impeccable vision for Colombia over the weekend, at least when it came to shoving teammate Dani Torres into an oncoming Argentine to get the foul call. [source: streamable]

In the Euro qualifier against Norway, Hungarian defender Daniel Bode brought out the equivalent of a rage quit. [source: youtube]

That white spec at the top of the screen is a KFC Izegem striker finishing up his whiz just in time for his teammates to score against fellow 3rd tier Belgian side Eendracht Aalst without him. He may even be fined for it. [source: 101greatgoals]

Scorpion kicks aren’t for everyone, Luis Figo. [source: /u/ADP-10]