Newcastle players blames Aston Villa draw on beach balls

With their club’s relegation already sealed, Aston Villa supporters decided to hold a protest/celebration of themselves during last weekend’s match against Newcastle. It was arranged that beach balls would be thrown onto the pitch during the game, which ended in a 0–0 draw that damaged the visitors’ own chances of staying up.

After the match, Newcastle’s Jack Colback came up with a lame excuse for the disappointing result. From the Chronicle:

He told the BBC: “Obviously the beach balls and inflatables getting put on the pitch made it difficult. We didn’t really get momentum in the game.

“It was stop-start. Everyone’s gutted. It’s obviously out of our hands now but we just have to pray Everton do us a favour.

“They’re a good side, so there’s no reason why they can’t go to Sunderland and get a result.

Blaming beach balls when they didn’t even directly contribute to a goal is a laughable statement. But, to be fair, it is understandable how the players might have found some of the inflatables distracting.

That sex doll might be Newcastle’s defensive midfielder next season.