Streamlining the employee tattoo process: An under-appreciated key to success in MLS

Are you a Philadelphia-area tattoo artist who enjoys doing snake designs and needs an executive title to impressive your parents? Well the Philadelphia Union have a position for you!

The MLS club is now seeking a “Chief Tattoo Officer” to handling all the tattooing needs of their players and staff. This is an actual listing on the league’s official jobs site.

The Union are requiring applicants have at least five years experience, possess a “diverse skillset as needed by clientele including American Traditional, Realism, Japanese and more,” and “must enjoy tattooing snake designs (after all, we have a snake in our crest).”

One wonders if Union players and staff really are demanding so many tattoos that an in-house artist is needed (and how many are getting club specific tattoos?) or if this is just a ploy to get some free press. After all, the job listing also states that the CTO would serve as a “team ambassador” and “respond to press/media requests to talk about the CTO experience with the Union.” If that’s underlying idea here, well played, Union. This is definitely going to get some attention.