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Tim Howard announces MLS return with claymation video
Lionel Messi hits woman with errant shot
Thomas Müller doesn’t want Xabi Alonso to be cold
DTotD: Robert Huth gets his shirt pulled off his body, referee isn’t bothered
Arsene Wenger suggests the Premier League is the new Champions League
Claudio Ranieri dubs himself “The Sausageman,” is the best
Future News: Marouane Fellaini admits belief that opponents’ heads are filled with candy
Spurs hook up Dele Alli and Kyle Walker to interrogation/torture device
In Which Diega Costa Has a Tender Nibble of Gareth Barry’s Neck
The Week’s Best Goals Are Turning Japanese (I Really Think So)
Barcelona prepare for Arsenal by training against random children
DTotD: Vincent Kompany smashes Sergio Aguero in the face with a ball