The week’s most absurd soccer moments

By Sam Patterson

In Putin’s Russia, Spartak Moscow goalie Anton Mitryushkin rushes you. [source: youtube]

Burton Albion’s Abdenasser el Khayati took advantage of some last-minute, ill-advised tinkering of the wall by Colchester United to equalize. [source: /u/gfycat]

Santos attacker Nilson won’t get to enjoy the murky wonders of third-party ownership and Joorabchian-eque manipulations with shot attempts like that. [source: Dirty Tackle]

Credit Lyon right-back Rafael with an assist to Montpellier, and Manchester United with transfer smarts. [source: Ligue 1]

After this punt, it might just be time for Notts County goalie and aspiring quadragenerian Roy Carroll to hang up his boots. [source: Notts County FC]

It might be that the heat got to this Colombian defender in a match between Once Caldas and Deportivo Tolima [source: ESPN FC]